I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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