Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
