5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Randomize