And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
