Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(402): View more from Nebraska

I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.

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(410): View more from Maryland

it was a mass text i'm sorry

(603): View more from New Hampshire

do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?

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(703): View more from Virginia

Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life

(541): View more from Oregon

Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard

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(802): View more from Vermont

clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.

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(254): View more from Texas

Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced

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(806): View more from Texas

I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.

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(309): View more from Illinois

I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.

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(239): View more from Florida

How drunk do you guys plan on getting?

(1-239): View more from Florida

We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?

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