they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
