I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize