Non-Jews are for practice
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
