have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
