But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize