they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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