Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
