We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
did i just pee glitter
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
