should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
