god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize
