Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
