we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
He better not be in your backpack
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Randomize