You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Randomize
