everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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