How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I'm passing your future prison.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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