Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
