So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize