How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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