if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize