So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
