my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
