THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Randomize