and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
