I'm laying in your front yard are you home
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
