your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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