No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
