fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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