i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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