So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
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