well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
