Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Randomize
