pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
where are you?
Hypothermia
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Randomize
