I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
