People with herpes should wear stickers.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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