new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
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