But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
