so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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