You're completely useless in the revolution.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
