I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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