Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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