Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize
