I puked a lego.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
wow bdsm is so cute
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
