I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Did I show you my penis last night?
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Randomize