found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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