Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
